Closing up when someone dies, part 2: Digital Identity

In my previous post, I listed all the things I wish I’d known to do right away when my Mom died. I looked for such lists but didn’t find anything clear and prioritized by immediacy, so I made one.

This post is for less urgent things. You shouldn’t need a death certificate for anything listed here, provided you have access to the person’s device/passwords. Now it’s time to turn some things off.

Facebook
You can notify Facebook here, although you should definitely check their Memorialization Settings first and make sure that you or someone you know is listed there, and that the Data Archive settings are as your loved one would wish. Though if you’re like me, you’ll want to request all the person’s Facebook data first anyhow, not to review but for safe keeping.

Amazon
The first thing to check is recurring orders on autopilot. My mom accidentally had TicTacs automatically arriving to here door once monthly from two different Amazon accounts. We now have enough TicTacs for years to come! Fortunately they were inexpensive, but subscriptions products may not be cheap. Turn them off. Then check for credits, points, gift cards, etc. After that, I recommend downloading the account data, which they make quite a pain but may be useful for financial records, then deleting the account. Note that this will cancel any memberships, like Prime, Audible, Photos, Kindle, and any related devices like Alexa as well.

Apple
Notify Apple here. Though you might want to download that data first.

Google
I’d suggest that you don’t notify Google just yet. You’ll probably want to leave that account open to see what else comes in, as this can help you figure out where to look for other accounts. Here’s where you can see what other apps have been permitted Google login access. And this is where you can find other linked accounts and security settings Go ahead and download that data now, too. Though you’ll want it deleted eventually, you probably don’t need any data that you’re creating after the fact.

Other accounts
In my Mom’s case, she never really used Twitter or LinkedIn or TikTok or anything. But she did have a few profiles some other places, like dating websites and crafts forums. The hacking potential on crafts forums is low, but dating websites? When in doubt, deactivate and delete. Look to the Google and Facebook and Amazon sign-ins to find used services like Pinterest, Classmates.com, etc.

Add that In Memorial email address that I mentioned in my last post everywhere you can. It does not need to replace the original, but it probably should in most cases.

I hope this has been helpful to you in this time of grief. I’m sorry this hurts so bad, and hopefully posts like this help things suck just a little bit less? Oh well, I can try. Keep breathing deep and taking breaks. None of this needs to happen in one sitting.